Clothing and Communication
jessicagoldharalson, jessicalouise and others are having an … animated discussion about perception and mode of dress. Here’s Jessica’s latest volley:
[I]’s … PRESUMPTUOUS, not to mention sexist, to just straight up assume that someone is showing cleavage because they “want attention” and “like the attention”?
That’s seriously one step away from the “She deserved it, look what she was wearing!” argument. … This feeds into an idea that women’s bodies are public property and not our own to control — or that we must hyper-control ourselves because the boys “just can’t help themselves.”
There’s also the statement you make that “if women don’t like the attention then they should cover up”. Why should I change my behavior because someone else is being an asshole?
I think everybody is partially right. (This sounds much more polite than, “You’re all wrong.”) Clothing is a form of communication. One Jessica is right in that clothing is a non-verbal form of communication. I have some clothes that say I think I’m a serious, business type person. Some say I’m a relaxed, artsy type person. Some say I am an incredible nerd. Some say that I want attention. Some say I just got out of bed. I even have a t-shirt that effectively says I’m a religious nut. (I don’t wear that one because it’s not the message I want to send—but I keep it around because, hey, wouldn’t it be hilarious to some day wear it?) Since I’m not a particularly stylish person, I’ll occasionally screw things up and wear clothing that sends the wrong message. (Usually that message is that I didn’t pay very careful attention when getting dressed.) If somebody is communicating something in the manner they are dressing, I think it is perfectly reasonable to assume that either they meant to communicate this or that they are bad at communication. I also think it’s fair to assume that any message your clothing sends is sent to everybody you expect to see you—even if that isn’t your desire.
But the other Jessica is right about the interpretation of the message. The message of a particular shirt might be that it is hot outside and this is how the shirt fits rather than, “please objectify me.” Similarly, there isn’t any clothing, no matter how risque that sends the message that the wearer’s body is public property. Communicating something with clothing does not justify anybody’s gross failure to reasonably interpret that message. And it definitely doesn’t excuse inappropriate responses to that message. Additionally, it is perfectly reasonable to work to change the way society interprets certain types of dress.
I don’t, however, think it is a good idea to expect people not to try to read anything into whatever we’re wearing. This sort of non-verbal communication is too important to quash in it’s entirety. Nor is it a good idea to tell people to ignore what strangers are wearing. We already have too many walls between us.